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church was alright as usual. cell was fun. adult service was superbly interesting. everyone's sick and down with fever. charlene, charity and rachel. i told charity i bet it was cookies she baked that made her sick. but she refuses to believe me. hahaha.
i cant wait for this month to be over. i really feel poor. i am left with $7. let me repeat: $7.for one week! thats impossible to live. i cant even eat my beloved fish and co. i have never felt so poor before. and mummy's not budging. she's refusing to give me money. i guess she realised i've been taking a lot. haha. last time i just ask and i'l get it. oh well. im learning my lesson. now i know how helmet and naked mole rat probably feel all the time. i wont make fun of them anymore. hahaha. right. gordy was freaky on sunday(as usual). charlene was duper mean to him. mind boggling! haha. that was lame. and he doesnt know what complex means. or some other word i cant remember. hahaa. i wish he stops taking the lift with the girls. how pervertic. squeezing with the girls into a small lift. cant he use his brains. YUCK YUCK. i know im supposed to be kind to him, but well, thats the guys problem. cos he's a dangerous guy to be with, so the girls shouldnt go near him at all. hahaha. i think i should really stop insulting him.
i stil kinda miss kuk. she msged mummy and said that her parents didnt allow her to go church. i mean, she's like 21 already leh. i feel that she should be allowed to make her own choice. oh well. there's nothing i can do, is there.
recently, i cant remember who but someone asked me what i am doing with my life. whether i am treasuring it and living life to the fullest. and i realised i didnt know the answer to any. my life is just an empty shell filled with mindless shopping and spending money so that i feel happy. filled with nonsence and shit. but i made a promise. and i intend to keep it. i dont wanna wallow in this shit anymore. i dont wanna always be living in the past. wishing that i could turn back time. cos this is now. this is the present. and i need to learn how to treasure it if not one day, i'l be looking back and regretting yet again. i repeated this mistake so many times. and i wont repeat it again.

i won't screw up this time i promise